5 things to do when you’re done bingeing Netflix (oh, and not working)

Posted on 29 Apr 2020 Posted in  Gaming, 'How To' Articles
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Sure, Breaking Bad is good and all, but have you felt the sheer thrill of a jigsaw puzzle recently? I’d wager not. With enforced self-isolation, the need for alternative distractions is on the rise too. TopCashback reports a huge increase in clicks in the Blu-ray and DVD, gaming and hobbies categories (+400%, +160%, +60% year on year respectively). In terms of sales Books and Magazines have also seen a dramatic rise (approximately +70% year on year).

When you’ve fully exhausted Friends for the tenth time, here are some recipes to relieve the impending boredom, whilst also helping to revive near-extinct hobbies.

 

What’s the name of the game?

You will need:

  • 1 of any of the following Monopoly, Cluedo, Game of Life, Articulate, Mousetrap, Risk (if you’re feeling particularly committed) etc.
  • 2 + more adults, and/or fidgety children in need of a distraction
  • A sturdy surface (preferably one that can’t be easily flipped over in a fit of rage)
  • Comfortable loungewear that does not restrict the waistline.
  • Snacks and drinks (not pasta or tinned beans if possible, plus whatever alcohol is at the back of your cupboard. Hello Pimms that expired in 2010!)
  • A strong sense of competitiveness, and a spirit that never breaks.

Method:

  • Get changed into your loungewear of choice and apply slippers.
  • Prepare the snacks and questionable jug of cocktail. Place on said sturdy surface. Switch off the TV.
  • Arrange your board game in an easily accessible manor for you and your teammates, and one where no one can sneakily add an additional £200 before passing Go. You wouldn’t want to be accused of cheating, would you?
  • Impose the following rule: no one is allowed to sulk, scream, cry or quit for at least one hour.
  • Commence gaming and ‘enjoy.’

Warning: if you are playing Monopoly, be prepared that self-isolation may well end before anyone wins the game.

 

Play your cards right.

You will need:

  • 1 deck of cards (ideally with amusing animals on, but not imperative)
  • 2 ‘adults’
  • Gin Rummy rules
  • Gin and tonic (either tinned or bottles are both acceptable)

Method:

  • Arrange your G&T concoction. Tip – fancy people drink from fancy glasses (or mugs).
  • Shuffle the cards – accept that if your opponent is shuffling, they are likely doing it wrong.
  • Prepare ‘game face’ – it’s not poker but there’s no reason not to get serious.
  • Applying the GR rules, whoever reaches 100 points first wins. If you feel your friendship/marriage/partnership can stand the test, take it to best of three. Or simply storm off in a huff if you lose.

Sew up for it

You will need:

  • Sewing paraphernalia of your choosing e.g. knitting needles and yarn, sewing pattern plus material etc. It is recommended that beginners do not start with anything too ambitious.
  • A nice cuppa.
  • YouTube how to videos.
  • Background viewing optional. Lighthearted and inoffensive television recommended if so, such as Ground Force repeats, A place in the Sun or Heartbeat. (Knitting can be more frustrating than relaxing FYI – no need to increase your blood pressure unnecessarily with the likes of Line of Duty).

Method:

  • Boil kettle, and switch on tele to safe progamme (see above).
  • Stretch your hands and fingers out to ensure they are nimble and ready.
  • Find your YouTube channel of choice depending on which sewing skill you are looking to learn or master.
  • Sew for it, hun.

Remember – this is supposed to be stress-free and fun even. If you find yourself getting annoyed, put any sharp objects down, and walk away.

Where’s my Where’s Wally book?

You will need:

  • 1 or 2 Where’s Wally books e.g. Where’s Wally The Big Journey.
  • Good lighting
  • Patience
  • Optional: a Breton jumper to immerse oneself in the mission.

 

Method:

  • Remove all distractions from your vicinity, if you want to find that miniscule scroll, one needs to commit properly.
  • Turn lighting up to full beam, this is not the time to squint (locate and position reading glasses if needed)
  • Carefully review the items and people to find on the intro pages. Fully familiarize yourself with the faces of Wally, Wenda, Wizard Whitebeard, Odlaw and Woof. These are your friends for the next few hours.
  • Commence your search for the tiny, tiny man.

 

(Not) Dancing in the street

You will need:

  • A dance mat (yes, they still exist!!)
  • Breathable clothing and sensible footwear (not slippy socks)
  • Rhythm and timing
  • A worthy opponent
  • Nerves of steel

 Method:

  • Get changed into your clothing and shoes of choice – including sweat bands if you’re going all in.
  • Remove any hazardous furniture and objects that may be tripped over from the surrounds, to create an open space.
  • Plug in said dance mat to your television.
  • Breathe, feel the rhythm, and shake what your mother gave you.
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